Unexpected spouses

[Savitr Tamboli]

”That is fair. Perhaps heirs would not be so near to my own thoughts if things could be different between us.” He told her without remorse. If children had to be the aim of sex with his wife then he would naturally be more inclined to think of children. Jani’s withholding the details of her religious vows made him less staunch in his will to uphold them. They were secret, he suspected, so that no one would try to talk her out of the nonsense.

What sort of priestess made such demands of another soul? He had wasted too much time wondering already. If a less drastic resolution could not be resolved between them then he would pay the priestess a visit. Replace her if need be. Only time would tell. Savitr had not intentions of allowing his wife to suffer a thousand years for the blunders of childhood.

”That is okay.” Savi leaned forward. Concern bending his brows down. It was wise to be wary, but she always turned to trembling fear when he was less than pleased. ”I am bold so that you need not be.” He was her husband. He would not hurt her without causation, and firm warning. And never in ways that would scar her, body or soul.

He still did not believe. She would try to try, maybe. But fear and overblown morality would make it difficult. Eyes crinkling he chuckled at her frightened reaction to his request. ”Why not my lap? There’s no reason to look at me like that.” As if he had asked her to dance naked or get on her knees in front of him. Silly creature.

Jani’s trust would be hard won. Like a horse turned feral. ”You’re not afraid, are you?” He asked when she finally sat as far down his leg as she could. Savi let her settle before tipping his knee up. A short rock of his hips bringing her lower. Closer. One hand in the center of her back the other to prop his head on when he sat back to look at her face. ”Relax. Nothing is forgotten. I am very pleased with how well you are adjusting to our home. And you are right, the broad strokes of our arrangement were made clear. What of the little things though?”

How would he know if she couldn’t tell him? It danced in the corner of his mind while he tried to explain what he really wanted to speak of. ”Will we share a bed? Will you be upset if I need to sleep beside you? I can respect your decision to  abstain from sexual gratification, but we are still spouses. You’re still a woman, just as I’m still a man. There’s not a reason we can’t be close- intimate even- without sex involved.” They were honest concerns. Things that wouldn’t make or break their marriage, so he had not stressed her before with such thoughts. ”When you do fall pregnant, whenever that may be, do you expect to stay home or will you agree to join me at court for the duration? I should like you close and I will take a leave of absence from Mariam if you will not stay there with me.”

Eyes drifting to the beads Jani fingered nervously Savitr caught an idea. He smiled, but stayed on topic another moment. ”You have expectations. Or at least hopes. Of how you want things to be between us. In public, in our personal lives, and in the privacy of our marriage bed too. I know you must. Now is as good a time as any to air them. If you wait we might both end up feeling jaded.”

That was what he really wanted to avoid. Another miserable wife he didn’t know how to help.

[Neha Rajani]

Neha Rajani looked at him through the fringe of her lashes. Not leaning away though he leaned in. Brows pursed over his sharp nose as he looked at her. She thought he might chastise her, or even the reverse and praise her for her meekness. What he said made her lips bow instead. Never what she expected. He had been bold since they met. Bluntly forward until she despaired he could ever be made polite.

”I had not thought of it that way.” Had looked upon it as a lack of manners, or too much ego. Not a balance to herself. She would speak of this next time she went to the temple. And pray on it. Perhaps he was a Darkness sent balance. Neha Rajani was not sure. He did not seem like a blessing. Especially not a holy one. Not when he asked her about children. Or to sit in his lap.

”It isn’t seemly.” Especially here where anyone might walk in on them. Or simply by the doorway and peek at them through it. What would the servants think to see them so? Or worse, unexpected guests. Not that she had had a single one, except for her husband. Though she protested, Neha Rajani did as asked. Slipping from her seat to Savitr’s knee with mouse like furtiveness.

”Should I be?” She questioned back, wanting reassurances rather than to admit she was afraid. With good cause as his knee rose and tumbled her back into him. Gasping, she caught herself against his chest, elbow slipping down his ribs and into the back of his chair. Heart racing, she tucked her face into the hollow of his shoulder and curled her fingers beneath it, some of his tunic caught in her hand.

While trying to calm her heart, Savitr rained questions upon her head, speeding her mind until all of Neha Rajani was aflutter. She turned her face into him as if to hide her blushing or the way she squeezed her eyes tight. Clinging to what frightened her, because she thought he might protect her too.

”I do not know, Savitr. I have thought of none of these things.” But he has. Desiring closeness with her. Neha Rajani feared it. Intimacy and sex one in her mind, being the only way she had ever known. Cheek to his shoulder she tried and failed to meet his eye. Looked from them to his nose to his mouth and then his lap. Which was also her lap. Hands coming together in their lap to worry her prayer beads.

”You have a great many concerns. And too many questions.” She told his chest. He inflicted little more on her than those. Hand at her back, the other holding his head up as he lounged, content, even with her crushing him. ”You would leave the court for my pregnancy? Is that permitted?” A woman was most vulnerable then. More than even a moontime which passed swiftly. Shrugging her shoulders, Neha Rajani had to admit, ”I would like you close at hand, either way.”

Surely none would tempt his Sapphire while she was gravid with his child. ”Let us leave the where for when it is at hand.” Hopefully she would know better then what she would prefer. Though she did not think she would like to leave the house. Crushing her hands together, Neha Rajani’s lip pursed. A thoughtful pout that set a single crease between her dark eyebrows.

”I do not know, Savitr. I had hoped for mutual respect in all those places. I do not thing I thought beyond that.” More worried about protecting her vows while trying not to upset her husband. ”Did you wish to share a bed? Even without...” She spread her hands wide, unable to say the words. Once she could have spoken them. She had been bolder before folly had taught her better.

Perhaps she was meant to also teach Savitr so that he would not know the stain of the soul she had.

[Savitr Tamboli]

Savitr’s eyes warmed as his smile lengthened. Of course she had not thought of it that way. Better, easier perhaps, to see the villain first. The danger he posed. In time she would learn that he was less a danger than those he protected her from. Smiling was his only response for now. There was no need to make her more uncomfortable.

”In what way?” He chuckled. Seemly! ”This is our own house. We are husband and wife. Surely no one will, or should, judge us our private moments.” Savitr wanted more of course. More than her slight weight on his leg. Her warm slip of body against his chest. But Savi always wanted more. That wouldn’t have been different if she were a lascivious wrench instead of a quiet little prude.

A worried, quiet little prude. Turning those oversized eyes on him like a pleading puppy might. So he stroked her from shoulder to mid back, then let his hand rest there once again. ”No. My mercy often outweighs my rage, and my love always tempers my anger.” He didn’t tell her that she would know, undoubtedly, when it was necessary to be frightened.

In between questions Savi took the time to enjoy her nearness. Those fingers curled into his shirt, face pressed near his shoulder. It made brushing his own face over her hair so easy. Temptation stirring his spear to a soft alertness. All his questions raining down as she tried to hide from them against his chest. It did nothing to lessen his desire, but it softened his heart towards her.

”I understand. You don’t have to think make up answers now, its better you search your heart so you we don’t end up with expectations you will regret.” He told her temple, since that was the only part of her he could see. A flash of her eye, and the heated space between her cheek and ear. That was all she could show him while his questions hovered in the room.

Laughing as she softly scolded his prying Savi answered with a shrug. Then laughed again at her question. ”Who would stop me? Mariam knows better than to replace me. If you preferred to be home, then we would be home together.” He liked, very much, her admittance that she would like him near while she was in such a delicate state. To protect her the way a man was supposed to protect his wife.

”Alright. We’ll save the where for the when, then.” He agreed. There were more important questions in the air anyway. The questions she was trying to skirt around, he suspected. Mouth drawing tight and a cute wrinkle separating her brow down the center. Even pensive she looked like a doll. His thumb drew a circle on her spine. Fingers twitching to pet the look from her sweet face.

He had to force himself to let her have her feelings. ”We can’t respect boundaries no one has set.” He countered. Still enjoying the sound of his name on her lips. She was worried. Stressed by his questions. But Savi couldn’t regret asking them. She would be more upset if he crawled into a bed she thought to occupy alone. Or found him watching her change without permission when she thought it… unseemly. All things that Savitr wanted to do, even if he couldn’t make love to her when and how he pleased.

That too, he hoped, would come in time.

”Making love? Or having sex? Yes, I would enjoy just being near you; and I am capable of being near temptation without giving in if that is your fear.” He had done ugly things. Things some thought he should have been horrified or ashamed of. But Savi had never forced a woman to his spear. Taken a few too roughly, or without care for their climax, but never forcefully. He had no intentions of starting with Jani.

Raising his head again he slipped his fingers around the beads she wore on her wrist. They were smooth, she must have used them for comfort often. Returning to his previous idea he smiled at her gently. ”I have something for you. A gift. When I see you wearing it outside of a formal occasion, I will assume it is an invitation to do more than share a bed. Then you need say nothing and I need not worry an… opportunity will be missed.” He called in a shining set of prayer beads. Much like the ones she wore. They were ivory and painstakingly carved. A last memento of his mother. It was a waste for them to sit in his cabinet. And his last wife had never had any interest in them. Letting them pool in his palm he ran a thumb over their glossy surface. Polished to a lusty sheen and strung on braided silk. He held them out for her, eyes eating up her reaction.

[Neha Rajani]

”Yes. You are right.” It was foolishness to worry about what the servants might think or what they might gossip. This was their house and they were a married couple. Neha Rajani worried anyway. About the thoughts behind his eyes and stroking palms. Of what might be said about her. Watch judgments might be made. How all these private moments would affect her vows.

”That is good.” It was, even if this talk of love disturbed her. Neha Rajani was torn. Did she wished to be loved by her husband? More pressing was the concern of her own heart. Did she wish to love him? Could she at all? Was it permitted within her vows? It was not physical pleasure. Just a different sort of nearness than the one they shared now.

Pleasure of the heart. Was it the same? She would have to ask, skin prickling as his face pressed in close to her hair. Which brought the rest of his body marginally closer too. Not Savitr, but her priestess. Neha Rajani was sure what sort of answer she would get from her husband, no matter how often he surprised her by doing and saying the unexpected. What he thought on the matters of intimacy were growing very apparent.

”I will pray on them then.” A seek guidance, but if she spoke that he was likely to be annoyed. So suspicious of her vows and dedication. So close! Neha Rajani wished he would not bring his face so close to her own. Wished he were ugly instead of handsome. At least he laughed instead of mocking her. And handsome was better than stupid. ”Savitr, she is the queen!” Surely she could as she pleased, even if Savitr’s Sapphire outranked and outmatched Mariam’s Summer-sky. Neha Rajani’s too, come to think of it.

Her open hands covered her face. He was too bold! His tongue loose like a shutter with a broken hinge. Neha Rajani laughed. Impossible man! Laughed and was horrified by his bluntness and her own amusement with it. Already he was changing her. She would have to be careful. Ward herself against him lest she slip backward.

”They are the same.” She told him, hidden still by her hands so she would not have to face him when speaking it. Sighing and shivering she let her hands fall, fingers smoothing the beads over her wrist. ”Very well. We may share a bed. And I will pray on the other matters.” It might have been easier with a list. So Neha Rajani would know what questions to ask. And what to expect.

Savitr stilled her fingers. His replacing hers in the space between her beads and her wrist. Knuckles against her fluttering pulse. Neha Rajani grew still, eyes looking from hand to face, unsure which she should pay more attention to. ”A gift?” Already? They’d received many at their wedding. And her mother had sent fabric and marks afterward so that Neha Rajani might better prepare her new household to her liking. She had need of very little. But this one would serve a purpose, as Savitr explained, heating her cheeks to burning. ”I see.”

The beads pooled in his hand. Warm ivory with surprisingly detailed carvings worked into polished beads. Smooth without being worn, which was surprising since they had been his mother’s. ”Thank you.” The were beautiful. And clever. He was wicked, her husband. His mind as sharp as his features. Neha Rajani slipped the prayer beads from his palm and vanished them into her cabinet. Biting the inner edge of her lip, Neha Rajani looked up, to find Savitr looking down. Eyes on her as if he could will the beads on her wrist that very moment.

”Ah.” Her heart thundered its way into her throat. ”Did you want dinner?” She still hadn’t been able to finish her drink. First too rattled and then too far, settled into Savitr’s lap like a kitten. Or a prize. Now she was ready for something else to distract him. Something other than her shallow breathing and rapid pulse.

[Savitr Tamboli]

By some miracle Savi managed not to roll his eyes. Pray on them then! He was very worried it was his wife being preyed on. Soon he would know. First he had to win a measure of Jani’s trust. Or else she might not forgive his actions if this priestess proved to be as false as Savitr suspected.

Was priestess murdering an act against Mother Night? He couldn’t help wondering. Not that fear of eternal damnation would keep him from protecting his wife in this life. He would protect his queen with equal aggression if it came to be necessary. ”Yes, she is the queen. My queen, even. Which is why she knows I am the best at my job.” And that he would prove it by killing anyone she thought to let usurp his position while he worked on family matters.

For now, he was bonded to Mariam. They needed his income from court service less than before, but Jani’s dowry would not last forever. He would be with Mariam some centuries yet.

Smiling widening at the pleasing sound of her laughter Savi nodded. Not to answer any question but because he enjoyed the reaction. He wanted her to laugh, to be happy and feel free again. Like a young, beautiful woman should. The shadow of her secret pain and the vows she tried to atone with paled the vibrancy of her behavior. It haunted him. Or the ghost of another young woman he had not been able to save did.

”Ah, my dear wife… if you believe that then you have never experienced the former.” Savitr told her with calm certainty. They were not the same. Even if the base act was. He was ready to show her. Amused and so enamored with the way she ducked behind her palms that he could have been ready right then. It would be wasted on Jani, sadly. All that passion. ”You should see the priestess in the village. Or at court. It’s good to seek the guidance of many and not rely too strongly on only one. It’s very easy for opinion to color preaching.” Maybe then she would see her favorite had been unfair in making her swear the unfeasible.

No one could go without physical pleasure forever. Not while their body was intact. And no one deserved to.

Head tilting he nodded, ”Yes a gift.” One he thought she would surely appreciate. Even if it served an ulterior purpose. He studied her face while she listened to his idea. Cheeks as red as a painted doll. She really was pretty in the most delicate sort of way. He watched even harder once the beads were in his hand. His wife was bright and savvy. She knew the worth of the gift, and appreciated its beauty. Silently, other than the cursory thanks.

He did not push for more. Though his enamorment with his doll wife had manifested more physically. Turned down the leg she did not sit on he didn’t worry it would disturb her. He could feel her heart racing through the palm he held to her back. ”If its ready, yes we should eat.” He had dance with temptation enough for one day.